little white truths

Hello and welcome to my first monthly positives post for 2018!

It's not quite the end of January but I felt like writing this post today because it's been a tough few weeks and we thankfully have a quieter day today (well, as quiet as it can ever be with two toddlers), so I'm taking a moment to breathe and think positive before the kids explode the silence.

I'm in the weaning doldrums, but I've used the negative energy in a positive way

I already knew I was in for a post-breastfeeding mood-dump when I started weaning my son because I've done this before and it ain't pretty. But last time I was pregnant when I was weaning, so I reckon the pregnancy hormones provided a little 'covering fire' for the weaning doldrums, and this time around the plummet has been deeper.

No one tells you about the perils of weaning. We've all heard about pregnancy hormones, but when you're breastfeeding, Mother Nature pumps you full of happy hormones (oxytocin and prolactin) so you're more likely to grow healthy, resilient offspring and ensure the survival of the species. But as soon as you start weaning, Mother Nature takes those hormones away (cow) so your mood skydives to the trenches. 

Anyhoo. Rather than wallowing in Mellon Collie and the Infinite Sadness (I'm showing my age here ; )), I've tried to channel my negative energy so I'm wallowing in the state of the planet and what I can do about it instead. Saving water, reducing waste, teaching kids environmentally friendly habits etc. You may have seen my posts on such things already, and do stay tuned if you're interested because there'll be more of them. 

Does this directed-wallowing make me feel less melancholic? Well no. But if I'm pushing negative energy in a positive direction, this at least makes me feel that I'm using bad energy in a good way.

One of my mottos has always been 'nothing gets wasted'. This applies to the doldrums, too.

THE TENNIS

I love watching the Australian Open. I look forward to it every year and it's one of the reasons why January is my favourite month. Yes it's been sweltering hot in Melbourne, but tennis gives us an excuse to stay indoors with the fan on!

We don't normally watch much TV during the day because I'm pretty strict with any kind of screen-time for my kids, but in my view, the tennis doesn't count. Don't ask me why. It just doesn't.

PLUS I get to yell, laugh and cry at the screen (outlet for the weaning doldrums), and when I want to explode at the kids, I just scream at the telly: 'CARN RAFA! BOOM BOOM BOOOOOOMMMM!!!'

It's bloody therapeutic, I must say.

My daughter starts 3yo kindergarten on Monday

As of Monday, my daughter will be in kindergarten for three full days a week (8am to 6pm). Sure, I mightn't leave her there for that long because I'm lucky enough to work from home so I don't need to, but up until now she's been doing half-days (7.30am to 12.30pm) and it's gotten to the point where it's just not enough for either of us.

She constantly needs to be challenged because she's so over-active, and while the childcare centre she's been in has been brilliant, my husband and I both felt that we needed to stay one step ahead of her and give her a new environment to explore and enjoy.

The flip-side of this is that my son will now be going from two half-days to three (he's taking my daughter's Wednesday spot at the childcare centre), so I'll suddenly have more time to breathe.

I need it. Christ how I need it. I can't tell you how much.

I'm on no buys for makeup and skincare until June

As you may know, I started a six-month skincare spending ban at the beginning of December 2017, so I've done almost two months now and I've stuck to it - minus one small essential purchase (which is allowed under my no buy 'rules').

And a few days ago, I decided that it was time to go on a makeup spending ban too. I've spent too much on makeup in the last two weeks, and although everything was bought for good reasons (ie, I wanted/needed everything and had for a long time, plus I took advantage of various sales), we just don't have the coin for that. Sure, I knew I'd be receiving book royalties and blog payments to cover the purchases, but we could have used that money for something else. Like, you know, water and food. And then there's the whole environment/waste/only buy what you need aspect, so I want to put my money where my mouth is. Pun intended.

I'm cutting the non-essentials flow until June. I'm excited and also nervous to see how I'll go. Yes I've done a blanket beauty ban before for a year (admittedly I only lasted ten months ; )), but I found it really difficult and it wasn't great for my mood. I'm hoping that it won't be so difficult this time around, for the reason below...

Soon, soon, I can start 'real writing' again

From the moment I fell pregnant with my daughter back in April 2015, I wasn't able to write. I'm not a good pregnant person and I can't sleep for the whole forty weeks (yep, not just the third trimester: the whole damn thing), plus the pregnancy hormones do cruel and unusual things to your brain.

Then came having a child and breastfeeding her, then came another pregnancy while I was still breastfeeding her, then another child and more breastfeeding and so on, so on.

Yes there's baby brain to blame, but the thing is, writing is about delivering emotional truths - so when all my emotions are tied up in the wonders and terrors of early motherhood, I can't write. This blog has carried me through the brain-fog years and kept me alive and (borderline) sane, but the writing has been calling. How I miss it.

I wrote a novel in 2014 that I'm itching to review, and there's a children's story that's been bubbling in my brain for almost two years now. They call to me every day.

And the baby brain is lifting, I've almost finished weaning and I'll soon have time to breathe.

Can't wait.

In sum

Them's my monthly positives for January. They may just be my happiest ones yet!

Do let me know in the comments what your positives are for the month: I'd love to hear.

Hope all's well with you, and speak soon x

* All images courtesy of unsplash.com