little white truths

I wrote this post for my author blog and, the more I thought about it, the more I thought it could be adapted for this, my life blog. Because I believe that writing and life are, in essence, the same thing.

Writing is the trade of experience. As is life.

You may have heard me say this before, and you may well hear me say it again. I think it’s an important observation because it reminds us that we must stay connected to our experiences in order to explore and convey them. If we’re not connected to our experiences, we won’t connect with others. Simple as that. 

The same applies to life. You must connect to experience, and experience to connect. Life is a two-way relationship (just as writing is always a two-way relationship between writer and reader) - you have a relationship with life and it has one with you. Celebrate that connection and don’t betray it. Be true to it and don't run from it. Life gives you experiences - good and bad. Your role is to engage with those, find meaning in them and move forward.

Life is not being celebrated. It just is.

As with writing, life is guttural. It’s within you or it’s not. It’s that scratch that can never really be itched, that monster that screams out if it’s not fed. The beast that treads your dreams. You’ll know whether or not you have this beast within you. If you feel that life has left you in some way (I know that's happened to me before), find out why. I honestly believe that finding the cause of things is often the first step towards moving past them.

Your relationship with life can swing from healthy to unhealthy in an instant – like a pendulum on an old clock. Keep an eye on things. Breathe more. Don't take things too seriously.

Life is a promise.

Writing is a promise to deliver emotional truths to your readers, to connect with them and understand them. It’s a promise to add something to your readers’ lives. I think there's a similar inherent promise in life. If we want to live well, we must act well - at least to the best of our ability. What can you add to your loved ones' lives?

I remember once I was having a terrible day, on the verge of tears for most of it. I was sitting on a tram and, as I got off, the driver gave me one of the biggest smiles I'd ever seen and told me to have a lovely day. Maybe he knew I needed that smile. His action changed how I felt - I felt better. Don't underestimate the impact you can have on others' lives - even the lives of strangers. Is there nothing more wonderful than random acts of kindness from strangers? I reckon not.

Writing is being both brave and humble. Life too.

It’s breaking down walls, pushing your boundaries and being courageous – despite your fears. It’s putting yourself out there and being willing to face the consequences. It is not being proud. It’s understanding the power of humility. In other words, man up and lose the ego. 'Manning up' includes asking for help when you're vulnerable.

Life is accepting – and committing to – failure.

Fall over. Get up again. Repeat, repeat. You may never be successful at anything. Deal with it and keep going. What else is there?

Life is compassion.

Writing is accepting your own faults and the faults of others. Treat all your characters with compassion, even your worst villains. Writing is not being judgemental. Same goes with life. Accepting yourself and others makes it shiteloads easier to get through the day. Being irritable or quick to flare is harder on you than it is on anyone else.

Life is understanding what it is to be human.

Enough said.